The Hellish Road

It has been a little over a year since a series of events that shattered my faith in my fellow man (with a few obvious exceptions, natch). And, as I’ve mentioned before, I haven’t been to Mass since. It’s not a matter of a problem with the Catholic Church, her priests or her teachings, but of my aversion to seeing people who wrap themselves in the name of Christ and/or a charism and don’t practice what they preach, and who lie through their teeth but have convinced themselves that they speak the truth.

I’m finally getting to a point where I’m not trembling as I think about it, shaking with suppressed rage; I’m learning to let God handle it. Surely He will.

I Really Was Going Somewhere With Yesterday’s Post

Honest.

On and off headaches for four straight days kinda kills the thought processes, eh? I’ll finish the thought here before the next onslaught.

~~

Where I was going to go as I talked about flowers and vegetables and gardening before the headache hit full stride is that lately I’ve been intrigued with the idea of straw bale gardening (also referred to as “no dig“). If you do a Google search, many sites will pop up and there are several ways to prep the bales. It’s apparently wonderful for those with bad knees (me) or bad backs, and once the bale is exhausted it can be used for mulch. It’s a wonderful alternative to messing around and digging in the soil. It’s supposed to be good for lettuces, beans, zucchini, cucumbers, tomatoes… but I wonder if I could do strawberries? I haven’t seen anything where I can. That would be freaking awesome. Herbs would be phenomenal–just clip whatever I need, instead of paying the usurious prices for a wilted bunch of thyme or whatnot.

But I wonder, would it not really do well in this climate?

I know I can do it in NC. Yippee! Here are some blogs to read. Completely intriguing.

 I think I’ll buy a bale after the new year, weather it, and play around with it. I’ll start with herbs and go from there. I can’t wait to have all the parsley I want.

~~

On the political front, people are up in arms about Obama picking all these Clintonites. The source’s response is that people who served for Carter are too old now; what a line of bullshit. The answer is simple, really: it’s time for Obama to pay the piper, so he has to hand out the goodies to the greedies. And the crowd is pushy and greedy for the spoils of his victory–how high is too high of a price to pay for his election? We’ll find out.

I’m sorry folks… but change, my ass. Boy, has he bamboozled people. Change stopped as soon as he picked Biden, that nominal Catholic, as veep. Nobody should be surprised. Politics as usual.

Two potential picks for his cabinet I consider a joke: the gauche and waspish Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State, and do-nothing Janet Napolitano as DHS chief? The former already has the lawyers out to pressure Obama–I wonder what the agreement before the nomination really said? Hmmm. And she’s already suspect by other countries, and by her husband’s conflicts of interest.

The latter has had me chuckling ruefully for the last couple of days–oh, he’ll be sorry about that one. Janet has sought to either ignore or overturn the voter initiatives re illegal immigration–this is the LAST person we need in this office. She has been a terrible governor of this state, a border state no less, that has huge problems with the flood of illegals. Other than that, the Repulsive runs an article about Janet and how much she loves her daddy for the feel good effect every few months. Janet has otherwise been a bust as governor.

Oh, it’s going to be a wild ride, folks: hold on to your seats.

Shhhh… be vewy vewy quiet

I spoke too soon in the last post (the recruiter wound up dicking him around a lot, and he finally said ‘forget it’ when she didn’t give him the damn job description or the contract outline). There are other things in the mix, so until something happens, I’m not saying anything. Silly and superstitious, I know, but that’s just the way I am. I don’t like talking about the possibility of rain when there are threatening clouds in the sky, because I don’t want to jinx it. Yeah, I’m weird.

~~

I had my annual physical the week before last. Despite being obese (honestly), my BP is ridiculously good, my bloodwork is fine, my tits and lymph nodes have no lumps and my pap came back normal. The only irregularity was when Dr P was palpating the ovaries and uterus and noted that my left ovary seemed inflamed, so he sent me to have an ultrasound.

I got worked up–the last time I’d had one done was when I had the ectopic, and it took everything I had to not scream  NOT AGAIN… no, it wasn’t an ectopic, thank God. It seems that I have bilateral ovarian cysts. They have made a wreck out of my left fallopian tube, making it look like my uterus has a left ear.

The nurse’s call to tell me what their assessment was actually made me feel lighter. I have, at least, a partial answer as to why I can’t get pregnant. And the results of the ultrasound only affirms my (our) decision to adopt.

~~

Hollywood’s at it again: the liberals there are making that cry once again that if the Republican wins, they’ll leave the country. It’s a broken record. Shut up already! Nobody cares, you crybabies.

~~

I do not like the talk (already) of riots if Obama loses, not at all. I resented it when that leverage was used for OJ (and he was acquitted!), and I resent it now. I also don’t like the implication that if you do not vote for Obama, you’re racist. Talk about racial tension.

No, racial relations have not gotten better with time after the decades, mostly due to fearmongering and ignorance. Isn’t it a shame?

~~

I was upstairs yesterday and DH had the TV on some channel. I could hear through the walls a female voice like a stentor, and I could hear it loud and clear through the floor and walls. It was driving me nuts! I came downstairs and made him turn the volume down.

It was Sarah Palin making a speech.

~~

Love her or hate her, one has to give Palin kudos for one thing: she has borne the worst of insults and mudslinging with grace. She’s been personally targeted, her children insulted, etc., and she’s kept the (relative) high ground. Have to give her credit for having guts… but I’ll bet there are many tears behind closed doors.

~~

For those worrying that McCain is too old: the presidential campaign trail is one of the most grueling things imaginable. He seems to be weathering it just fine. Drop it already.

~~

Once more, I’ll implore people to not vote because of race, religion, gender or anything emotional. Vote smart tomorrow, everyone.

Peace out.

Salted Slug, That’s Me

My response to stress is not like others’ response: many people become manic. They go nuts, can’t sit still, work out more, walk more, talk more, etc.

I become a salted slug.

I get depressed. I stop all activity. I stop hiking, walking, working out. I sit on the compy or read interminably to get my brain off of the topic. I ignore my body. I mindlessly eat a shitload of cheddar Goldfish. This time around, I’m back on Warcraft, which actually still bores the hell out of me, but I’m back in touch with old pals, which makes the boredom tolerable (my saving grace is that I’m not getting the expansion pack). I ignore my homework until the day before it’s due, instead of the good habit of doing my homework on a quiet Sunday.

With any luck, all of that is going to change. Last night, I was typing back and forth with a pal on WoW when DH calls out, “Baby!”

The tone broke me out of my trance. “Yeah?”

“Come here!”

The one night that he leaves his cell in the car is the one day there’s an important message on it. The one company he was hoping to go to had their recruiter contact DH and say, “They want to hire you ASAP.” The problem was that it was already nine, so it has to wait until today.

So last night, and this morning before I left the house, we’re cautiously happy. It depends on the offer they make. Dan’s condition is that it’s contract to hire–and the guy who interviewed him was having difficulties getting his boss to give him the green light. The downside to the contract deal is that we’ll have to do COBRA for three months–not cheap–but you just cannot be without health insurance these days.

So things are looking up.

~

The preliminary offer means that once an appropriate offer is made, we can go forward with the adoption process. For obvious reasons (see previous posts), it was on hold. Assuming it’s an appropriate offer, we’ll sit down, complete it, and send it in to the agency. Then we’ll have to wait anyway for the application and the fingerprints to crawl through their process.

Cross your fingers, please.

~~

Yesterday, the media was all panicky over the ’skinhead plot’ on Obama’s and 102 other people’s lives. Funny, by this morning, it’s been diffused to a couple of idiotic wanna-bes spouting off with racist bullshit.

Nice little piece of fearmongering.

~~

I can’t wait until November 5. Since I truly believe that neither candidate is appropriate for the highest office, it won’t be with a sense of relief in that regard. Rather, it will be a release from all of the ridiculous media bullcrap.

I am wary of Barack Obama because after all of this time, nobody still really knows who he is; he’s been cleansed of any real past (his flighty mother has been elevated to sainthood and his absentee father is not spoken of at all). I’m not an ignorant fool–I know he’s no Arab or Muslim, or any of that ridiculous rumor mill bullshit–but really, who is this first-term senator from Illinois? Why are people so hysterical over him? That kind of mindless hysteria bothers me, and I don’t care who is the object of the hysteria. Old biddys who are vehemently anti- many liberal stances are voting for him, but can’t explain why to save their souls. It’s a weird phenomenon. And where in the hell did he come from that he has this insane rise?  Nobody heard of him until about a year and a half ago.  

I’m no fan of John McCain, either; he represents my congressional district, and as far as senators go, he’s been relatively steady and all of that; certainly he’s no Ted Stevens. For me, the only thing going for him is that he is a known quantity compared to Mr. Obama.  I’m not worried about his age–look at his ass-kicking mother–but I do wonder about his legendary rages, his irrationality, his vindictiveness. I do not believe he’s Bush, Continued–people who are saying that could never then vote for many people, as for the majority of the time, a candidate of a particular party will vote for the party line the vast majority of the time. Duh. But McCain has many weaknesses that makes him equally undesirable as a potential president.

DH has wished often that we were voting for the Veep candidates–both of them are more desirable than their running mates. You want change? Let’s aim for Sarah Palin: she’s a charmer and a half, smart, witty, and has actually held her own in the ghastly mud-slinging from the media and everyone else. Talk about a woman with guts! Have you noticed that every single thing they try to pin on her has pretty much slid off, much like egg off teflon? Not that I’m naive enough to think that she’s faultless–not like my boss, who has been useless since her nomination, praising her to the skies every chance she can–but then none of the four represent the lily of a blameless life.

Eh, that’s just dreaming. Don’t fool yourselves, folks: we’re screwed either way this election cycle.

~~

The paint is done and the tile is in. It’s beautiful. I like the fact that I can Swiffer the place. I’ll post on that later–it’s phenomenal.

~~

I don’t care what is written about me as long as it isn’t true.  –Katharine Hepburn

This and That

Funny thing I saw on the way to work this morning: a lady running with her dog, probably a Great Dane, and I glance down at the dog’s feet. The dog had teeny little ankle weights on. I laughed.

~~

This media-fueled panic re the banks and market was predicted nine or ten years ago. They lowered the credit standards for mortgages, and now, despite being warned by experts, they are freaking out. They made loans to people who should never have been buying a house in the first place, so why should the majority of mortgage holders, who made savvy decisions in their purchase, who make their payments on time and manage their finances, pay for these idiots? And the “idiots” include the banks that made risky loans. You don’t need a degree in finance to figure this whole thing out.

If they insist on a bailout, it should be given with many, many restrictions, conditions, and oversight committees. Neither the lenders nor the people who made poor financial decisions should be given carte blanche, especially with the already overburdened taxpayers being asked to foot the bill.

That’s just my take on it.

~~

DH flipped out a little bit in the adoption process. Mostly on the financial aspect, but I also wasn’t clear on timelines, either. He was under the impression that everything had to be done before the end of the year… no, so sorry. My bad. I also think that the abstract conversations now being concrete blew his mind a little. But despite the lashing out last week, I know we’re going to be okay: we were looking at the MLS for houses in the GSO area and he was looking at the schools.

It’ll take time, but we’ll be okay.

~~

He’s also got this hangup that we won’t be able to name the child what we want. Babe, hello? If our names are going to be on the birth certificate when the adoption is finalized, you’re darn tootin’ that we can pick the name. Naturally, if we adopt an older child, it’ll have to be a gradual rebadging, but the fact that the kid has a name from his/her birthmother does not preclude us from selecting a name for our new child. Silly hubby.

I have news for you: the Mc/Mac, -aiden, apostrophe catastrophes, and mangled spellings phenomena for children’s names are never going to be allowed in our house. That is one thing that he and I are in absolute agreement on, no atrocious names. I might tease that potential names are Edith and Otis, or Macmadysinlynne and Mavryk, but no “tryndee” or otherwise crappy names will be allowed to cross our threshold.

I have to say that for the most part, the children of family, friends and acquaintances are pretty solid. A sampling includes Juliana, Andrew, Joseph, Catherine, Blair (boy, a family name), Matthew, Daniel, Caitlyn (at least it’s not terribly mangled), a couple of Sarahs, Emily, and Joshua. The only one that is kinda out there on the top of my head is Maile (MY-lay), but it is a Hawaiian name and part of her heritage (I don’t think her mother thought out the terrible tease factor she’s going to get in high school, though).

Over the years, DH and I have toyed with Anthony, James, Robert, Anne, Lauren, and Elisabeth; the other day we discussed the merits of Christopher. Neither of us like the overly Old Testament sounding, such as Benjamin or Nathaniel, and neither of us likes the current naming trends and popular crap. The trend is towards the classic names. However, serious consideration of any name is slated for a later date, once the hurdle of certification has been cleared.

~~

I had a long talk with my dad last week. We had a heart to heart, and I know he’s grieving for my lost dream of having my own baby. I basically told him that testing could go on forever, then the reproductive medicine part can drain our accounts and any funds he offers, and I just won’t ruin all of us financially. I told him with the utmost sincerity that it has been the hardest decision in my life. He finally aquiesced, and now he’s supportive.

Next part: DH comfy enough so that we can have an open discussion with his parents about it.

~~

I hate it when a preliminary estimate is nowhere close to the actual. I’m not going to get into it, but I’ll just say that we have to settle for Phase I: Tile. Tile will be installed in the living area, kitchen and downstairs bathroom. I’ll still have fuschia carpet everywhere else in the house for now. Ugh.

~~

I’m only six weeks into the semester and I’m beat to hell. The only thing keeping me going is that every week is closer to the end.

Ninety Years Ago

Ninety years ago, and in the middle of the night, a group of nine scared people were waiting in the basement of the house where they were being imprisoned. Woken in the dead of night by the head guard, they’d been told to dress and go down to the basement, as they were to be moved elsewhere for their safety.

The mother had requested a chair, as she had painful sciatica. The father carried their chronically ill teenage son down into the basement. Their four daughters followed instructions quietly, as did the two retainers who had stayed loyally, each clutching pillows. One can imagine the dread that stalked them all.

They went down to the basement to die.

Dragging Ass and Going Crazy

I am so tired of my friends in the South complaining it’s hot. They complain that it’s 84 degrees. I’d give my eyeteeth for 84 degrees right now. Hot? You want hot? I’ll give you hot: it’s 112 here in Phoenix yesterday and today with no end in sight, far above normal (104) for this time of year. Add to that, monsoon season should be here soon–it’s already a little sticky this morning–so it’s getting nasty here.

Now shut up already and count your blessings. You friends are welcome to come here and experience it for yourself–you’ll never complain about your so called “heat” again.

There, I feel better.

~~

I know I’ve been MIA, but there’s so much going on it’s not even funny. Let’s take last week, for example: fly to Vegas on Tuesday morning because Better Half has a seminar in the northwest part of town, and wanted to take me along to see Cirque du Soleil on Tuesday night. Cool and awesome. Mystère is a great show, and afterward we walked through Treasure Island and the Mirage, then went back to Suncoast to sleep. We wandered around when we had time—after his seminar was done on Wednesday around noon, we checked out from Suncoast, went to lunch at the old Peppermill (which was great) across from the nasty Circus Circus, and then wandered through what the late and great Dean Martin referred to as the “Meggum” (MGM Grand)—I hadn’t been there in fifteen years, and have forgotten how huge it is.  We each had a beer at the Centrifuge Bar, watched the bartenders dance on the bar top, and then reluctantly headed out back to the airport and back to The Furnace (Vegas’s weather was warm and balmy, but not unpleasant).

Both flights—in and out of Vegas—ran late. Why is that? It’s no further than L.A., so why? Ridiculous.

Now That the Long Weekend is Over…

…and the parties and barbecues and the joy of an extra day off have subsided, let us remember what Memorial Day is really supposed to be about.

I have brothers and cousins who have served, or are currently serving, in the military (an elder brother served in Desert Storm; a cousin returned safely–thank You, God–from Iraq). I’m lucky, so very very lucky, mine are safe and whole.

Not everyone is so lucky. This was posted on Fark this morning.

 

Remember to say thank you.

Remember to keep them in your prayers.

Or, if you don’t believe in a higher power, hold them safe and respected in your memory.

I’m Baaaaaack

I took a little break. That, and I wanted the Wildland Firefighters post to be up on top as much as possible.

What’s up?

Obama is roaring, Hillabeast refuses to die, and McCain’s campaign is slowly crumbling.

The fire season started early. It’s rompin and stompin.

We hit 110 for a record the other day. Ugh. Going to be a long summer.

~~~

Allow me to qualify anything I say about Ted Kennedy after this point by stating that I wouldn’t wish his diagnosis and prognosis on anyone. The picture in the paper this morning is probably misleading–he looks the same as always–because everyone knows his suggested treatment and probable death sentence has to be eating him and his family alive.

However, Ted Kennedy is becoming The Most Holy Martyr Saint Edward of Hyannisport even before his death.  But the sanctification of a man–politically, mind you–who has done nothing but fill a seat Daddy Joe bought for him in the 60s is rather nauseating.

I guess because I was born after what I call the Kennedy years inthe 60s, I don’t have any stars in my eyes in regards to that family. I know people in my elder siblings’ age group and in my parents’ generation who have tears in their eyes during discussions of Jack and Bobby and the mythology that surrounded them. Maybe it’s because as I was growing up, Camelot had started to lose its luster and innocence, and it was becoming widely accepted that had Jack lived, his presidency would have been disastrous. And who knows about Bobby, had he not been cut down?

Strangely, these same people who hold the elder brothers in high esteem never held the same feeling for Ted, who never was in the same league as any of his three elder brothers. It is commonly said that Ted was never as bright intellectually, as savvy in the political sense, or as crafty or charismatic as Joe, Jack or Bobby.

Perhaps, too, it is Ted’s permanent black cloud of Chappaquiddick, a shocking incident that showed a lack of personal responsibility and morals, and became a showcase of Ted’s overriding sense of self-preservation and ego (and never mind the Kennedy talent for making problems disappear).  What normal friend–and possible boyfriend–would go to such lengths to cover tracks and, at the same time, showing an absolute disregard of someone else’s life? What kind of person would skip away with a mere slap on the wrist? In the annals of failure, this ranks way the hell up there–it’s an incident that would have destroyed the career of lesser mortals.

That said, I wish the senator well, and hope for a recovery despite a dire situation.

~~~

Around Phoenix, in the bus stops, Food City has posters in the ad windows. One version has a background of a multitude of votive candles, and the logo says, “Estamos Con Ustedes” (We’re With You). The other looks similar, with the statement, “Estamos En Su Lado” (We’re On Your Side). The Food City stores are owned by the Basha family, and caters to the Hispanic market in the Valley. Way to go, Eddie Basha! Way to encourage illegal immigration!

Of course, that’s where he gets his cheap labor… so what else is new? *sigh*

Failure on a spectacular scale.

~~~

I’m off and running. Have a great holiday weekend.

Well, Well…

As one poster on a forum put it, “You have awakened the Hilldebeast” in reference to the interesting events of last night. The two days previous were spent saying how Hillary’s campaign was over and that she should give up the ghost, and this morning “OMGLOLZERS, TEH KUMBAK!” I told you previously that she’ll scratch her way through: now watch her turn the convention to a political bloodbath and have her come out the winner for the nomination. Her ‘dream ticket’ thing is a smokescreen; there is no freaking way that a) she’d ever follow through, and b) Obama would say ‘thanks but no thanks,’ much preferring to stand on his own.

Here locally, the papers are tittering over our lovely governor not knowing who she was supporting at a Obama rally. Oh, lovely Janet, do nothing Janet, raised eyebrows. Is she losing it?

I wonder who will run for McCain’s senate seat? 

 McCain’s sweep last night is no surprise. What will be a surprise is who he picks for veep. The important question is, will his health hold out? This should be interesting.

*sigh* … another election where you get to pick awful or worse; who is who depends on your affiliation.

This is our best and brightest? How scary.